その幸せの気持ちって。。。

"掛け替えのないもの" meaning "irreplaceable thing". simple as it sounds... 25years living this life... i'm sitting here with good health,great family,best support and i had gained almost everything i wished during my childhood,alhamdulillah. this is more than what i hope for actually..ternyata rezeki Allah itu sungguh luas... dan dalam 25tahun ini juga ada byk perkara,benda,insan dan peristiwa yang telah datang walaupun mungkin ada antaranya yang telah pergi,yang boleh dikategorikan sebagai yang "tiada gantinya"... skop ini luas tp hari ni mommy nk cerita ttg SENYUMAN... senyuman siapa? of course la anak mommy yang cute-mute nama Rayyan ;) ada apa dengan senyuman Rayyan??? actually pengalaman nih dah byk kali mommy lalui.. xtau nk kategorikan perasaan nih nama apa.. yg pasti ianya rasa sgt BAHAGIA! dan setiap kali berlaku benda nih,tanpa disedari ...xtau dari mana datangnya..mesti tiba2 air mata akan keluar... i'm quite sure this is what people call as AIR MATA GEMBIRA. because;

gembira(bahagia)+air mata=AIR MATA GEMBIRA

bila???

okeh... biasanya bila Rayyan buat orang lain;

1. ketawa
2. rasa bahagia+
3. adores you like their own+
4. nampak terpancar di wajah2 itu berkata," i love this kid"...

sometimes we can see people being their true self when they're playing with kids who's just plain and do whatever they want,when they want... mungkin ibu2 di luar sana pon pernah merasai perasaan yang sama.but as a young mother n plus baru ada satu baby...perasaan ini really makes me wonder... walaupon,cuba sembunyikan air mata tu dpd terlihat dek org lain...hehehhe

so..thank you God for giving me opportunity to feel what it's like to be a mother and to care for other souls..thank you for blessing me with this abundace of happyness and love...and above all, for giving me the chance to receive and feeling appreciative when others are giving...not to forget, for your special gift to me,Rayyan

i'm blessed!

erasing the memories

rayyan deary, kebelakangan nih rayyan byk meragam la mommy tgk.. maybe badan xberapa sihat ka naa? 早く元気になってねえ！ arinih mommy nk cerita sikit psl mommy's childhood story... i had a besfren..the very best i ever had( i used to believe so..). she was so precious to me.. we do everything together,we shared so many things and enjoyed doing it. we struggle for the best and created dreams we hope to achieve... we've known each other from standard 1.. the vows of "bestfriends forever" were often said... until 1 day,(which i myself am not sure when) we started to grew apart. of course the distance and time were among the reasons.. but i'm sure there's more to that.. just not said in loud voice. i made mistakes..(who doesn't?) and i asked for forgiveness.. she accept it verbally not truthfully.. maybe it is too hard to forgive a bestfriend who shares many things with you compare to some stranger.. and then again,it is easier to hurt people you love the most than some strangers. it really broke my heart to read what she wrote about me.. unfortunately,she had erased all the good in me and focused on the bad things i've done on that single occasion. i can't deny the fact that she's good with words..she's good at that. but i've never imagine her thinking about me that way. i wish i can deny..i wish i can protect myself for every accusation she hold on me...but,then it'll only make me hate her more when the truth is i care. so, i let her be.. let her hate me.. let her throw me from her life picture.. from her albums of memories... and maybe.. i shud just stop caring for her and start erasing all the memories.. i'm still trying... but the vows of "bestfriends forever" is still playing in my head.

if tomorrow never comes..

If tomorrow never comes

If I knew it would be the last time That I'd see you fall asleep, I would tuck you in more tightly, And pray the Lord your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time That I'd see you walk out the door, I would give you a hug and kiss, And call you back for just one more

If I knew it would be the last time I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise, I would tape each word and action, And play them back throughout my days

If I knew it would be the last time, I would spare an extra minute or two, To stop and say "I love you," Instead of assuming you know I do.

So just in case tomorrow never comes, And today is all I get, I'd like to say how much I love you, And I hope we never will forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, Young or old alike, And today may be the last chance You get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow, Why not do it today? For if tomorrow never comes, You'll surely regret the day.

That you didn't take that extra time For a smile, a hug, or a kiss,

And you were too busy to grant someone, What turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today, And whisper in their ear, That you love them very much, and You'll always hold them dear.

Take time to say "I'm sorry,""Please forgive me," "thank you" or "it's okay". And if tomorrow never comes, You'll have no regrets about today Norma Cornett Marek